Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
