I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
PANTIES FOUND
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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