i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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