sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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