she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
