john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Then you guys just all showered together...?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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