If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
