No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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