I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
