New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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