But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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