So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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