Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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