sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
