i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
You pole danced in your parka.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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