well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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