literally had 100 drinks last night.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
