Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I am spending my child support on dildos
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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