Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
