Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize