You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Randomize
