you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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