Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Couch. On fire.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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