Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
