sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
