I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
