I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
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