As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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