But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
