Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
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