When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize