btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
