Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
