Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
