Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
