just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
