i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Is Oprah even human
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
