Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
