You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
