i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
