How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
