I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
