all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
