Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Randomize