I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
