He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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