So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
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