Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
