it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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