Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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